As I am writing this, I am subconsciously thinking about all the items that I need to secure and pack as well as trying to fill and submit documentation for the other programs I am doing after the ILC as to aid a smooth transition. I have been waiting for what seemed like millenniums for this opportunity to embark on a summer program at Brown as well as college visits in a substantially short time frame. Also, the most important purpose kicks in here; this is also for the sake of WCCUSD and many of the community leaders, teachers, faculty, students, parents, business owners and workers, politicians, criminals, and many other community members in which I am leaving behind geographically and physically, but will carry mentally as to represent this district and the geographical jurisdiction associated with it in a competent manner.
The packing process should have moved swifter as there were some obstacles that I had to overcome by trying to find the optimal place in my luggage for every one of my items and also by going through items and determining whether each of those items is needed for the four weeks or not. Nevertheless, it is also a bit strange to succumb to such a great opportunity when I could have been much more prepared early on but I believe that this experience will help me with this weakness that I have. My stringent mother also made me clean up my room so that I can even organize in a better manner for this trip and I thank her for this as it gave me a great lesson that organization is what the eye should focus on and the prize is a less stressful and insinuating experience no matter what you do. I can definitely benefit from this as I believe that my high-strung and flustered personality actually yields worse results for the objectives that I want to accomplish.
Now the sun is setting ever so quickly below the horizon over the familiar view that I will forever remember and cherish but that signifies the end of the journey here in the Bay Area. I, myself, have been to a considerable amount of destinations internationally and nationally but I view the sun as the beam of hope and progress that I incorporate with my actions and deeds and I know that I will not see the sun rise until I am on the airplane flying thousands of miles away from this enclave in which I reside in. The sun settings marks the end of an era where I have some sort of dependence on others and when the sun arises again, I will be virtually in an environment of that of a college student, where independence and maturity is paramount. I have naively, yet naturally yearned for these modes of life. I do have a slight sense of anxiety that familiarity and nostalgia may be apparent in the more subtle meta-cognitive cycles that I experience while on this trip. But alas, it is inevitable. I will know that the excitement and the phase of experiencing collegiate life in its full capacity (I still lived at home and commuted even for Stanford and UC Berkeley, whether it be at a friend's or a relative's house) will override and transform me for the better. Endorsing, balancing, and interweaving both in the name of character and societal advancement will be needed and thus will be the ideal, yet attainable norm.
Pondering upon what will occur at Brown and at the reputable colleges gives me great excitement and bewilderment simultaneously. The art of predicting matters yet to come may be reliable or it may not in certain circumstances and scenarios but for a matter that is this large of a milestone and an adventure, the result will be a bit different from the hypothesis in which I formulate. Spontaneity will be a factor I definitely look forward to yet I hope the resonance for which I may cherish and share may thereby ensue.
Another point I may add is that I have been so fervent to experience all these distant colleges and to experience some of the resources and programs that are offered. The environment and campus life oozes charisma too. Even though the personification may be a bit odd to correlate to a certain meaning, first, many matters are relative and second, places tend to have the heart and soul of a certain iconic aura, that which is shaped by a seemingly infinite amount of factors. Dissecting these factors is exciting and stimulating yet I hope that it can't contract from the more aesthetic, theoretical portion of matters. A perfect equilibrium (I am a chemistry nerd so if there any out there, post some of your favourite equilibrium equations and I will incorporate it to space in between these parentheses.) would be awesome but again what can constitute perfect. The realm of man is limited to the absolute incorporation of matters according to Nietzsche, given the argument to which the essence of worshiping God is inadequate and decimating to the measure of life and epistemology of thought. So basically go existentialism. Philosophy discourse and rhetoric on a day where I can fully think and be retrospective on matters. Economics should be a large focus and I basically can't wait to fully be engaged and to even express conclusions, claims and opinions while studying empirical models as well as interdisciplinary relations to the world as macroeconomics delves into.
Thus, I should probably hit the hay but I am truly looking forward to this journey beginning at 3:30 AM tomorrow until July 12th in the evening where I will still be busy afterwards. It is the gaps in between as well as appreciating and relaxing in the moment that I persistently work on and perhaps that craft will be accomplished. Hopefully on an even larger scale but enough mopey-dopey platitude on that. I will eat, arrange and send documents, organize, pack more, check (probably will lead to most of the time), and hopefully fall asleep. As Don said, I ought to be rejuvenated and ready to roll at 3:30 AM! ( Only seven hours!)
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