In order to not have the same primitive (just kidding) idea for the title, I decided to title my blog this in order to focus on other aspects of the program. I didn't have any sort of reminders in the form of midterms or anything else which helps with the intuition of the dissertation that half of the program has elapsed. Thinking about it makes me way too reminiscent and emotional which will cloud my full enjoyment of the program.
I am going to try to incorporate the idea of seeing the pros and cons of a certain topic, which will be my day as I am trying to embellish and try ways in which I may have not liked in the past. Benefits and costs to be more econ-y (my instructor even used that term!) Hopefully, it will lead to some epiphany that I haven't come to terms with in my writing as well as my outlook on this experience or even on life in general. We'll see! Sorry if it is formulaic, just trying out new stuff to see if any improvements can ensue so that my blogs catch a better glimpse of my true thoughts, perceptions, and experiences.
Starting off with pros first where I finally was able to watch the Academy Award winning movie, A Beautiful Mind for macroeconomics class at half past seven. I have always been a fan of game theory after my interest in the economic applications that have proved ubiquitous in academia as well as popular culture. John Nash has always been an inspiring figure as he grew up in very humble beginnings, was humiliated and was treated horribly in the mid-20th century as he had schizophrenia, has lived on the outer fringes of society and has been considered odd, but has overcome many obstacles to win the Nobel Prize in Economics in 1994 as well as being offered a highly ranked position in Princeton after the long-hauled climb to getting his thesis to be even considered by faculty at the university. He reminds me of a character who still had the aesthetic as well as the uniquely wired mind to persevere and to embrace how game theory applied in not only economics but many other applications as well. The movie chose to depict one example of the competition for a blond woman in a bar to highlight romanticism and to make the idea similar to a broad audience. (as does many American movies to a large degree) Despite my harsh critical lens on mainstream movies as facts and analysis can be compromised as a result to obtain more viewers, I honestly felt that example was explicitly brilliant.
In fact, I believed that the movie moved me where I was honestly close to activating the glands in my eyes (or just close to crying, which way of saying it do you like? Better than saying that I put tear drops in my eyes as those definitely aren't crocodile tears) as I felt that the struggle or the transcendentalist nature that he undertook to change main pillars of economic theory from pioneers like Adam Smith which have stood for hundreds of years really inspires me to be innovative and to project my true passions as well as any unique aspects of looking at matters. Now, I regret not doing game theory for my post AP-exam project. I will be sure to do so in math club where I can also do group theory as well! Since no other pupils were interested in group theory when it is honestly cooler than typical and commonplace topics in math like complex numbers and probability and statistics. Although Baye's Theorem was just as compelling, but only to a certain degree.
Going to office hours showed me a world which was different from any other university I have visited where I got a glimpse on the collaboration of graduate students working in a similar space specific to their concentration. Seeing Desi help me with clearing up certain tasks and terms in the economics homework as well as talking about Bulgaria's geography and culture was worth the incredibly short navigation to Robinson Hall. It was interesting to see how so many amenities for a department based on international business and economics (more microeconomic) with a nice foyer where the graduate students (including Desi) converge over boxed lunch gives an atmosphere of a casual workplace. I had an enthusiastic conversation about my probability of doing well in economics at schools that may be a good fit after receiving help as well as discussing PhD research processes as well as stipends makes me further interested in pursuing higher pedagogy to make my unique mark and problem to be solved apparent in the world. I just hope everything will work out but confidence and a visionary drive will definitely help. As well as being enthusiastic about relating and being interconnected with society and the world around me first.
The main con other than the especially strong humidity when contemplating about it in the wee hours in the morning was that of being ineligible to donate blood. I will not state the reason over the blog but the reason was a ridiculous one which is especially discriminatory. In California, it is perfectly fine for me to give almost the same answers to the questionnaire and the interview but somehow in Rhode Island which is supposedly up to date on promoting modern science and social values doesn't seem to be polished just yet. Far from it, actually. What I don't understand is how the Rhode Island Blood Center claims to check the blood of all donors to make sure it is suitable for recipients to intake safely. All of the members were not accommodating to any delineation as they believed that they were to be confidential. Now I am banned from donating blood just because I offered to help and yet they weren't even willing to listen to an explanation. I think that is absolutely absurd and I don't know if further steps will help solve the issue not only for me but for many others who face similar rejections with poor logic and reasoning of the rule to provide as evidence but I don't think it will hurt to try. Plus my blood type is rather rare in the pool of other donations of blood in the entire country; this ultimately reduces a chance for someone of my blood type to get the blood needed in a manner that is as efficient or as productive as someone with AB blood for example. I don't want to jinx anything, but what if that was me? All I can do is pray and live life I guess...
Main moral: Develop and apply the true skills and passions that you cherish for good impacts to be exerted on society and stand up for injustices and results which aren't fair nor logical. Take risks and dare to be the agent you genuinely want to be as well as for others to benefit from (even if the response isn't too receptive, if you know it will be beneficial, keep on trying.)